The Jensen Murder Investigation
by Clint Cooper
Summary: An alternate universe where Sheldon and Leonard are detectives and Penny is their assistant. A woman is murdered and Howard is suspected to have done it. Bernadette comes to Cooper-Hofstadter Investigations for help proving he didn't murder her. A possible suspect is Amy and Sheldon is oddly intrigued by her. Shamy and Lenny will be featured.
Sheldon shook his head in disappointment as he looked at his notes on the people he'd just interviewed.

"I don't think we need an assistant Leonard." He said with an annoyed tone.

"We do need one. You just don't _want_ one." Leonard argued. "We need someone who has actual social smarts to help us with our cases."

"We didn't need social smarts before!"

"We did but we managed without it." Leonard said. He was used to complaints from Sheldon but he put up with it because he was certain Sheldon was one the smartest detectives in the world. The two graduated in the same class and were friends because everyone else was too cool to hang out with either of them.

When they finally graduated Sheldon didn't find any existing detective jobs up to his standard so he wanted to start his own investigatory business. He needed money for an office so Leonard offered to help if he were to be a co-owner and the two had been in the business ever since. They'd been successfully handling small cases for a year until Sheldon and Leonard managed to solve a case for a millionaire, Arthur Jeffries, which gained them a high reputation and a large monetary bonus. The millionaire gave them one piece of advice though:

" _Whilst you were great detectives you need someone who can talk to people and understand emotions. That'll make a well-rounded unstoppable investigatory team."_

With their new money from Arthur and new reputation which bought in more cases, and even more money, they needed extra help and they now had the money to pay another person.

"If we have managed without an assistant we can continue to do so…" Sheldon continued.

"We've been feeling the stress with the large amount of clients we now have. It'll be great to have someone to help." Leonard rebutted.

Sheldon sighed loudly. "Fine! Get the next candidate! How many do we have left to interview?"

"Two." Leonard stood up and walked out the office. Leonard then walked back into the room and was followed by a blonde female who was society's definition of attractive. She sat down in front of them.

"Good … morning." Leonard said as he sat down again. He stuttered a little and seemed nervous compared to the previous interviews.

"It is a pleasure to meet you Dr. Hoftstader and ." She said and gave a big smile. "My name is Penny…"

"I have your resume here in front of me." Sheldon interrupted "Your grades at school are only average. Why should I hire you then?"

"I am good with people." She said "something that their phony tests could not measure."

"Curious." Sheldon said "Give me an example of where this has helped you."

"I just broke up with my douche of an ex-boyfriend. Do you want to know how I knew he was cheating on me?" She asked.

"Not really but if that is what you're story is leading to…"

"I saw his eyes twitched 3 times when I asked how his meeting with the guys was and that is a sure sign that he was lying." Penny explained "I asked him more and more questions and he kept lying. But I figured that he was cheating and who it was with without him telling me anything explicitly."

"Impressive." was all Leonard could say to the beautiful woman in front of him.

"Petty relationship drama doesn't impress me." Sheldon said. "Tell me something else that will want to make me hire you."

"I'm socially smart, I'm good at manipulation and trickery if that is your style of detective working, I'm good at getting people to talk and…. what else do you want me to say?" She questioned.

"I've hidden something in the room." Sheldon stated. "There are several clues. Find what I have hidden."

Penny looked at Sheldon with derision. "You are lying. I can tell."

Sheldon couldn't help smile a little but then stopped himself "Impressive. I am lying."

"For the record you are easy to read Dr. Cooper. I'd improve on that if you want to continue to be a detective." Penny said.

"You're giving your interviewer advice?" He was shocked by this.

"Did I hurt you Dr. Cooper?" She asked sincerely "That wasn't my intention."

"He understands!" Leonard spoke up finally.

Penny nodded and asked "What is the next question?"

"I have enough. You are free to leave." Sheldon was writing notes as he said this and didn't look up.

"Look Dr. Cooper. I am not smart at science or math but I know you don't need that because YOU are and that you need some like me on your team." Penny told them.

"Ok." Sheldon nodded "I will inform you of your employment, if I choose you, soon." He gave a weak smile and continued writing notes.

"Thanks Dr. Cooper and Dr. Hofstadter." She stood up "I hope to hear from you soon." She walked out of the room.

"Goodbye!" Leonard said loudly. He turned to Sheldon. "What did you think? I was impressed by her."

"You were impressed by her physique." Sheldon said.

"I was not!" Leonard exclaimed.

"So you think she is unattractive?" Sheldon questioned

Leonard took a deep breath "Of course not! Yes, she was good looking but that is not why I said she was impressive. I like her street smarts and strong attitude."

"Ok." Sheldon said. "She is probably the best candidate so far but is only a 'meh' on the assistant hiring scale. Bring the next person in and let's see if they are more than average."

Leonard walked out of the room and then back in. She was followed by woman who had long black hair.

"Good morning." Leonard said to her.

"Yes, social niceties." Sheldon said sarcastically.

"My name is Alex Jensen." She said.

"I know. I have your resume right here." Sheldon held up the sheet of paper. "But I see you have no previous detective experience or schooling. Why do you want to work here?"

"I need to get away from my previous job." She explained. "My boss is a psychopath and I need any other kind of work since I haven't been able to get any in my field."

"It says you are a physics assistant at Caltech." Sheldon read. "I got a doctorate in physics before going to school to be a detective. Why don't I test your intelligence and you explain…"

"Dr. Cooper! I really need a job!" she exclaimed "Can you please hire me?! I'm desperate!"

"I don't think raising your voice is going to help." Leonard chimed in.

"I can't stand my old employment! I'll literally do anything else! I'll be safe here!" she said loudly.

"If you aren't going to take this interview seriously I'll have to ask you to leave." Sheldon said.

"Sheldon!" Leonard reprimanded "We aren't going to do that…"

"I'll beg! I'll do anything!"

"Please leave Ms. Jensen." Sheldon said. "Don't make me ask again."

"Dr. Cooper please…" she began to say but Sheldon gave her a glare. Alex gulped and cautiously walked out of the room.

"Well that was rude." Leonard said whilst looking straight at Sheldon.

"Yes she was but I wasn't very impressed by her resume otherwise." Sheldon said.

"I meant you asking her to leave so soon."

"Well I was never going to hire her anyway. She is clearly way too vulnerable and we already have us who are emotionally unstable from time to time." Sheldon explained.

"I guess you have a good point." Leonard said "So who are we going to hire?"

Sheldon sighed. "Mediocre it is. We'll just have to hire the blonde one."

"Her name is Penny."

"I know I was being facetious." He stood up and walked out the room quickly before Leonard could say anything.

#

 _A week later._

"Good morning Dr. Cooper." Penny stood up at her desk when Sheldon walked into the offices of Cooper-Hofstadter Investigations. She was sitting behind a desk which had a computer and a large amount of paperwork on it. The offices of their firm had four different rooms. A main room where the entrance and Penny's desk was, Sheldon's office, Leonard's office and a storage room for important case items like files.

"How is sorting those case files?" Sheldon asked.

"I'm nearly done but it is certainly challenging." She said "You're lucky you have a big enough spare office to store all that stuff."

"'All that stuff'?" Sheldon questioned her language. "I know you're only new here but I'd appreciate it if you formalised your language."

"I will Dr. Cooper." She nodded. She really wanted to impress one of her employers. "We had a call from a woman who needs your help. She has heard about your case with Arthur Jeffries and seemed very desperate. She scheduled an appointment at ten." Penny told Sheldon.

Leonard walked out of his office at that moment and was shaking hands with an elderly woman.

"Thank you so much for helping amidst your busy schedule." She said.

"That is okay. Your case was actually quite easy again Mrs. Vartabedian." He smiled at her. She said goodbye and left the building.

"Is she still paranoid her new neighbour is a communist?" Sheldon asked.

"This time she thought her new neighbour was a Nazi." Leonard nodded. "Turns out it was just Penny." He gestured to her and she gave a smile back. Leonard's face went red instantly.

"Her cases are ridiculous but they pay well." Leonard justified.

"I have to get ready for our appointment at 10." Sheldon said and walked to his office.

Leonard looked at Penny and gulped. He knew it was very inappropriate to have a crush on someone in the work place. But in the few days that she'd been there he'd been in awe of everything about her: Brains and beauty.

"How are you Penny?" he asked her.

"I'm good." She responded. She was looking through some files.

"How is your work so far? Are you happy here?" He asked.

"I love it here Dr. Hofstadter." She smiled when she said this. "Some of it is challenging but I'll learn."

"Ok." He responded. "And please, call me Leonard."

"Ok, Leonard." She nodded.

"Ok." He said. He stood around like he waited for some magic to happen.

"Do you need something Leonard?" she asked him.

"No." he shook his head and felt himself getting flustered. He began to become nervous and had no choice but to leave the situation before she noticed. He quickly left the room and back into his office.

Penny giggled as she read one of the file names. "He totally has a crush on me."

#

Leonard walked into Sheldon's office. "I thought we were meeting our 10 o'clock in my office."

"That is what you thought but it won't be true." Sheldon stated.

"Why?"

"Because you are now in my office. If the client is not tardy then she'll be here any minute." Sheldon smiled mischievously "So you might as well stay here."

Leonard rolled his eyes and sat down in a spare chair. Penny walked into the office a few seconds after with a shorter but still blonde female who was wearing glasses.

"Bernadette Rostenkowski-Wolowitz is here to see you Dr. Cooper and Leonard." Penny introduced her.

"Thank you Penny." Leonard gave a big smile. Penny nodded and walked back out the room.

"Why did she just call you Leonard and me Dr. Cooper?" Sheldon whispered to Leonard.

"I said she could call me by my first name." Leonard answered.

"But I requested she call us by our formal titles. Gosh you've ruined all social greetings with her when we're together. Do you know how odd it is for her to call me Dr. and you Leonard?" Sheldon explained. Leonard gave a blank stare like he was confused and Sheldon shook his head in disappointment. "I'll have to talk to her about calling me 'Sheldon' instead but I am not happy….!"

"Excuse me." Bernadette interrupted Sheldon. The two noticed her squeaky voice.

"Good morning." Leonard said. He gestured towards the seat in front of them "Please sit down." She did sit down.

"Why are you here Ms. Rostenkowski-Wolo…." Sheldon began

"Just call me Bernadette." She said. Sheldon gave her a look of derision given the conversation he just with Leonard about names. But considering how long her last name was he then reasoned it was for the best.

"Why are you here Bernadette?"

"My husband is in jail and I need you get him out." She explained.

"What did he do?" Leonard asked.

"He didn't do anything! That is why I am here!" She explained "The police think he murdered Alex Jensen." Both Sheldon and Leonard's eyes opened wide in shock. They'd interviewed her a week before. Also murder cases were rare and tough to deal with.

"Alex Jensen?" Sheldon questioned "Physics assistant at Caltech Alex Jensen?"

"Yes." She nodded "It only happened last night so the news haven't gotten hold of the story. But I swear he didn't do it! My Howie would never murder someone."

"To be fair you are his wife and therefore biased…"

"Sheldon!" Leonard interrupted "Be nice!"

"Fine!" Sheldon said. "Bernadette, what exactly makes you think he didn't murder her?"

"Because he was working late in his lab all night and then went straight to his Vespa. I may track his phone for …" she paused to think her words though. "Well he often lies when he buys stupid things. I was making sure he was actually at work late instead of buying another set of expensive dolls."

"Then why do they think he did it?" Leonard asked.

"Because they found his fingerprints on her dead body!" Bernadette stopped talking and began sobbing. Leonard grabbed a box of tissues from Sheldon's desk and gave it to her.

"Those are mine!" Sheldon exclaimed. "She is going to get those germy…."

"Sheldon!" Leonard reprimanded.

"No it is okay." Bernadette gave back the tissues mid-cry. "I understand germs. I'm a microbiologist."

"So if your husband is no to blame then do you know anyone who might be?" Sheldon asked.

"I was at home! I wasn't at Caltech! I don't even work there!" She exclaimed. Sheldon looked at her suspiciously. She was oddly defensive

"Then who do you think did it? We need somewhere to start." Leonard gave a smile to calm her.

"Howard told me of others who were also working late and knew Alex Jensen." She told them.

"Who?" Sheldon and Leonard asked together.

"Well Amy Farah-Fowler, a Caltech neurobiologist, was working that night. She is apparently friends with Alex Jensen. And Rajesh Koothrappali, an astrophysicist, is my husband's best friend and has … had … a large crush on Alex." She explained.

"We'll take them into consideration. I'm sure the police is already interviewing them anyway." Leonard said.

"They are certain it is Howie."

"Howie is Howard Joel Wolowitz?" Sheldon questioned. Bernadette nodded. "I read about him on the NASA website two years and seven months ago. He went to space after he built a waste disposal system for the International Space Station."

"That is correct." Bernadette nodded. "How did you remember that?"

"Eidetic memory." Leonard explained. "That is how he is so good at all of this."

"I am happy I chose you for the case then." Bernadette looked sad but managed to give a smile.

"We'll have to begin preliminary work Bernadette." Leonard said. "We hope to get back to you soon."

"Thankyou." Bernadette said. "I have to go to work now. Please call me when you find out anything!" she said. She shook Leonard's hand, said goodbye and left the room.

"Well that was fun. Do you often get murder cases?" Penny said sarcastically as she walked in.

"You heard that conversation from your office?" Leonard questioned.

"You left my personal intercom on Dr. Cooper." Penny said.

"Please call me Sheldon…" he said begrudgingly "And no I didn't…" he then saw that Leonard had unknowingly bumped it. He rolled his eyes. "You are bound by the confidentially agreement you signed when you became employed here…"

"I know." Penny said "But how are you going to solve this?"

"Well clearly we talk to the police first and find out details of the crime scene." Sheldon said like it was obvious to Penny

"And we talk to Amy Farrah-Fowler and Rajesh Koothrappali." Leonard said. "Bernadette's suspicions about them may be accurate."

"It is odd that Alex was frantic about her psychopath boss when trying to get a job here." Sheldon remembered "We need to talk to him too."

"Okay." Leonard said. "We'll get case details from the police and then split this up and talk to one person each." Both Sheldon and Penny nodded in agreement. "But be careful. One of them might be a murderer."

 **I know I am still writing another fiction but this was in my mind and I needed to get it out. I will still write the Parallel Universe Conundrum but this idea was too good to wait on. Thanks for reading :D**


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